Dating Profile…


I have never looked better.


I have never felt better physically, besides maybe when I was in boot camp in Great Lakes, Illinois or training at the RTC in San Diego, California…


I have never been more at peace. It’s a hard-fought, uneasy peace at times, but it is peace nonetheless.


I’ve never been more single though. I’m single as shit. It’s crazy really…


My retreat from the grips of “all-social-media-all-the-time” has been documented, (and needed) but I have also retreated from dating sites. They suck these days, dating sites…


Dating sites worked well maybe 10 years ago for guys like me perhaps, but not now. They don’t work as well today for me because my expectations have changed a bit. Also, I see the same people on all the sites I have tried in the area. Just recycled profile pictures all over the place.


I suppose I have resigned myself to the reality of living and dying alone. This arrangement isn’t all bad at the moment, but it could suck pretty badly if I reach old age and still haven’t found a nice pretty lady.


Pretty is a thing too for me. I’m dead ass sick of being rejected by mediocre looking women. If she isn’t truly exceptional looking then I’ll take my chances elsewhere. She also needs to be fit. I spend hours in the gym each week. She at least needs to be in shape.


The older I get though, the more I realize that the entire “mating and dating” phase of my life isn’t exactly in its beginning stages. I’m far closer to the end of the era where my reproductive drive dictates the majority of my decisions. Nowadays, I just want to plan and make art when I’m not working. I don’t want any stress related to pleasing another fussy human. I don’t want to be responsible for the emotional well being of another adult. Not yet. Soon maybe…


When You Have No Control…

Let me just state for the record that control is an illusion. We never have control over much of anything in our lives. We have responsibility and we have authority, but we seldom, if ever, have control. This applies to street photography as much as it applies to day-to-day life.


I’m not a handsome dude. It’s a shame because my mother and my youngest sister (my mom’s daughter, I have 2 other sisters besides) are drop dead gorgeous. As for me however, I’m unattractive, and this is made painfully clear by the number of failed dates with women I have had in my life. I’m just not impressive I suppose. I used to be a skinny guy and I thought that women didn’t like me because I was skinny, so I started hitting the gym 5 days a week and still do to this day. Now I’m pretty buff but I get the same results: I get passed over like the glasses-wearing fat chick at a sophomore ring dance. Currently I’m thinking I need to be rich and famous and maybe then women will flock to me. Hmmmm…..Familiar logic. I sense that life has laid out a an obviuos pattern for me….


As for being rich and famous as a photographer and internet personality I still wouldn’t have any control. In that circumstance I’d be an easy target for ridicule over my looks or my lack of formal education (I never finished at Morehouse college). I’d be roasted on twitter every time I misspoke or posted a poorly composed photograph. This was once a scary prospect until I realized that the control I fear I’d lack then is the same control I lack NOW. The only difference is at this point I have no support. No fans. No one is in my corner and everyone thinks I’m just some uneducated nigger with a big mouth and an expensive camera. Perhaps they are right. I’m beginning to realize that what people think about me, and what I think about myself largely does not matter. Only my actions matter.


There will come a day that I will have authority. I will be the best at what I do, perhaps the finest ever. I will have the power to help others and the discretion to obliterate any enemies that may emerge. Until then I’ll keep grinding, day by day, and try my best to keep things under control….



Street Photography is Balance

Street Photography is both a private and a public experience.

There you are, walking through misty autumn rain with your 50mm lens and your trusty DSLR or rangefinder. It is man vs. nature. It is recording what light allows you to record. It is wickedly delightful people watching. It is deciding what to capture and what not to capture. It is your trial and error. Get the shot, miss the shot. Nobody can help you compose and shoot. It’s just you. Street Photography is your personal failure or triumph.


That scarf is why the universe was created…

Street Photography is also social networking. It is interacting with people. Unless you are using a telephoto lens, or shooting with a wide lens and cropping, in order to get classic street photos of living subjects you have to get close. In fact, many shooters use a 35mm lens or wider so that they are forced to interact with people. I am on the fence about this method myself. I use a Canon 50mm 1.2, which is not too wide but also not considered telephoto. It forces me to get close to my subjects, but not close enough that I disturb the candid nature of the scene every time. Sometimes subjects spot me and react as I snap the photo. Sometimes they walk by and have no idea what I’m doing. I suppose I use a 50mm because it is balanced, and balance is one of the key aspects of street photography.

Many gurus will charge top dollar to host a “seminar” just to tell you that balance is essential in life. I’m telling you here, for free, that the need for balance permeates all things, and street photography is no different. Street Photography is the daily micro-struggle, and it integrates itself into your life alongside your morning coffee at Starbucks or walking your girlfriend’s yappy pure-breed dog 3 times a day. It is your exercise routine and your healthy diet. Used correctly, street photography can help bring about the balance that we all need in our busy lives. Just keep at it. Dress comfortably. Keep your eyes and ears open. Stay low and keep Shooting…..

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