I recently quit alcohol, cigarettes and staying up late at night doing nothing….
I dunno, one Sunday morning after having sex with some random chick, hungover, depressed, I decided that I’d had enough….
There were other reasons…. the dark circles around my eyes seemed like permanent fixtures on my face, I had been drinking and staying up late for so many years….
I smoked maybe a pack of cigarettes per week. Hardly a major habit, but I rarely if ever smoked unless I was drinking coffee or alcohol….
So here I am, sober and taking more magnesium so my mood had been a lot better lately. I’m once again the scarred kid I was 25 years ago before all of this rock star madness initiated. Oh yeah, I bought a new camera too. You might have heard about that….
Many of us connect our drug and alcohol consumption to our art, as if the two are richly interrelated. It’s not as simple as that. It’s more “quantum”. Our art is influenced by drugs and not influenced by drugs at the same time. The dark places many of us call to when we generate art remains, drugs and alcohol just changes the lens we use to examine those sources of inspiration….
I never used to drink before going out to shoot anyhow. It would suck if I dropped my camera because I was drunk. Weed is a different story. I don’t consider weed to be a drug really. It’s more like a vitamin to me….
Going to sleep earlier, sober, has reconnected me to all the dreams I missed before, or maybe I can just remember them now because of my newfound clarity. I also realize that I held on to sources of pain for no better reason than to milk them as convenient sources of self-pity. I’ve made steps to clean that up….
I’m not saying I’ll never drink again. I am saying that I’ll never drink alone again. Fuck that shit. I’m not going to drink in public either, particularly at bars and taverns. I already have one fairly recent DUI and will never have another. Also, all those trendy bars and taking silly ladies out on dates can get expensive…
Street Photography has not changed for me. Well, maybe I think I like it more now….